The World of Work

This falling down and getting up business can't be compartmentalized.

A funny thing happened to me during the last month at work.  God called me out there as well.

There was a change in Quality Assurance staff, and suddenly I found that I wasn't doing as well as I previously believed.

I took the increased error rate pretty hard at first and felt like giving in and giving up.

But my GM, who is a super fellow, gave me a pep talk which essentially ran along the same lines as what my Confessor and Soul Friend has been telling me.

When you fall, get up again.  If you fall again, get up again.  If you need to repent, do so and refuse to beat yourself up.

This lesson is slowly being learned.  Hopefully my whole life will be more productive as a result.

If at First You Don't Succeed, Try and Try and Try Again

There's a really funny Stargate SG-1 Episode called Window of Opportunity which was loosely based on the movie Groundhog Day.

At the conclusion of this hilarious episode, Colonel Robert O'Neill says "If at first you don't succeed, try, and try and try again."

This reminds me of a favorite Eastern Orthodox saying I refer to often in this life of repentance. "If you fall down, GET UP.  If you fall down again, GET UP AGAIN.  How long?  For the rest of your life."

The Orthodox Church bills itself not as a courtroom where sinners are condemned, but a hospital where they are healed.

For many years in my Christian life, my experience was that my life in Christ was more like a courtroom.  I kept waiting for the gavel to fall, for "GUILTY" to be shouted out, and for the heavenly Bailiff (or the men in white coats) to take me away permanently.

Orthodoxy has given me the hope that perhaps things don't have to end that way with me.

It is okay at times as an Eastern Orthodox Christian to doubt that I'm going to be saved.

That's called Humility.  From that humility comes the hope that maybe I'll be saved after all.

The key thing to remember is that God is good and I can trust Him with the outcome.

I will simply give this a good solid effort and see what happens.

I know my individual works can't save me, but following hard after God might just do the trick.

If only I had known these things during the dark times in my life.  Instead, I wasted a few years on unnecessary despair.

Saint Silouan the Athonite said that Christ told him the secret to Christian humility.

"Keep your mind in hell, and despair not."

In other words, always be mindful that you are worthy of hell, but keep your hopes firmly in Christ.

Humility and Hope.  This is what Christianity offers to us, if we will just reach out, believe it, and take hold of it.

The struggle is not the enemy.  The struggle is okay.

Fall down, get up again.  And again, and again.  And hope for the day when falls come to an end.

Blessings in Christ,

Columba Silouan

How Does One Repent in a Secular Context?

This new blog is dedicated to the ongoing process of daily repentance, which all Christians need to engage in throughout their lives.

The word "Monastery" literally means "House of Repentance."

Most people can picture a Roman Catholic or Eastern Orthodox Monastery.  Monks, Nuns, Robes, Vows of Celibacy, Vows of Poverty, Works of Charity, and Holy Lives.

But how does a married Eastern Orthodox or Roman Catholic or Protestant Christian make his own secular home and secular life a "House of Repentance?"

The word "secular" in this context means any endeavor or organization which is non-ecclesiastical or non-church or non-ministry based.

From this understanding of things, my family is an ongoing "House of Repentance" for me, as is my workplace and my network of associations and friendships both inside of and outside of my local parish church.

For this first post, I will simply list a few phrases to generate thought about this subject of repentance.

"It's Your Kindness Lord, That Leads Us To Repentance."

"Behold the goodness and severity of The Lord.  For those who have fallen, behold His severity for those who follow Him, life and peace."

"Woe to those who are treacherous without excuse."

"Every Prating Fool comes to ruin."

"Repent and be Baptized, every one of you, for the remission of your sins."

And finally these:

"I confess that I have sinned against Thee in thought, word and deed by what I have done and by what I have left undone.  I have not loved You with my whole Heart.  I have not loved my neighbor as myself.  I do earnestly repent, and am heartily sorry for these my misdoings.  The rememberance of them is greivous unto us, the burden of them is intolerable."

"I Believe Oh Lord That You are The Christ, the Son of the Living God, who didst come into the world to save sinners, of whom I am chief."

I will periodically update this blog as I explore and reflect on my own journey of repentance and where I succeed or fail at it, from my perspective.

Blessings in the Holy Trinity, One God

Columba Silouan